I never knew I had a problem with being unproductive, until I became homeless. "Became Homeless" like I completed a course in order to be fully prepared to live a life of doing nothing.
I thought I could make the decision if she didnt care and if I could convince myself that she didnt need me. I was unprepared to battle my own neediness because fuck it if she is content with or without me, I am totally boring without her.
It would be easy if I didnt have friends or family. I would be homeless and have nobody to talk to besides myself. And I would too, I would wander up and down city streets talking to myself and wearing a Fresh coat.
being homeless is all about the coat and making a decision is all about other people.
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